I'm going to speak candidly here. When I first saw this t-shirt I simultaneously sneered, chortled, and rolled my eyes. STRONG... Seriously?! What kind of a cruel joke is this? How could anyone who knows the depth of this disease put the word "strong" in the same sentence as hypopara, let alone make it the tag line for hypoparathyroidism day? Some days Hypopara robs me of the strength to simply lift one of my children up when they need comforted or cuddled. It weakens my hands and arms so that prolonged handwriting, baking, painting, coloring, typing, reading a book (basically anything that I love to do with my spare time besides binging on Netflix) are now accompanied by an excruciating numbness, tingling, and pain. There are many times when I find myself stuttering over and over again, trying to speak aloud a simple word or sentence like "could you feed the cat" to my husband, but all of a sudden it will not come to mind, because this horrible disease rears its ugly head and yanks away any strength of mind I ever had. And don't even get me started on the teeny tiny amount of exercise I dared to think possible so that I could gain some semblance of health... Every attempt has left me with a pain that torments my muscles and goes down deep to my bones the next 2-3 days afterward. I constantly, day in, and day out, feel as though I am losing a never ending battle with a horrific Calcium sucking monster that eats every ounce of strength my body would dare to procure. I have sincerely never felt more helpless, weak, and defeated in my entire life.
Yet as I pondered on this word more and more I realized there is another kind of strength I am learning about through this ball and chain of a disease, but it digs much deeper than the physical aspect I have always associated with that word. You see the fact is, I am still here, stubbornly staring in the face of the monster every day shouting, "I am not done, take what you will today, but you do not own me!" That in and of itself takes strength. It takes strength to have patience with my defective body too. It takes strength to lay my pride down and ask for help when I need it. It also takes strength to accept my weaknesses that I simply cannot change today. It takes strength to choose to still enjoy life's many gifts that I CAN enjoy instead of let myself drown in bitterness at the unfairness of this disease. It takes strength to discipline myself to care for my body as it is. And it certainly takes heaps of strength to hope that tomorrow could be a better day. So in truth, I don this shirt today inwardly smirking at the irony of it, but simultaneously embracing this word that feels foreign on my tongue, but soothing to my soul. Though we often feel helplessly weak, those who suffer from hypoparathyroidism ARE strong.
Unfortunately baking has not been in the cards much for me lately what with juggling two rambunctious kiddos, two moves within 3 months, buying a house, selling a house, oh and yeah this crazy disease I mentioned. So the recipe that follows is from a few weeks back when I wrote a post in honor of my daughters teachers. I posted the recipe for Raspberry Lemon cupcakes, and now here is the recipe for the Blueberry Vanilla ones. I hope you enjoy and finally, if you would like more information on hypoparathyroidism and how you can help please go to- www.hypopara.org.
Vanilla Bean cupcakes
Ingredients
1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, room temperature, plus more for pans
2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour (spooned and leveled), plus more for pans
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
1 ½ cups sugar
2 large eggs plus 3 large egg yolks
1 tbsp vanilla bean paste or one scraped vanilla bean
1 cup low-fat buttermilk
Directions
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line 2 muffin pans with cupcake wrappers.
In a medium bowl, whisk flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt.
In a large bowl, using an electric mixer, beat butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Mix the eggs, yolks, and vanilla paste in a small bowl. With mixer on low, beat in the egg mixture, slowly in 4-5 additions. Alternately beat in flour mixture and buttermilk beginning and ending with flour mixture; mix just until combined.
Using an ice cream scoop to ensure even and precise measurement, fill each cupcake liner 3/4 of the way full with batter and smooth the tops once all liners filled. Bake until cupcakes are just barely golden brown on the sides and a toothpick inserted comes out clean. Remove from pans and let cool completely on wire baking racks before piping the buttercream on to them.
Blueberry buttercream
Ingredients:
4 large egg whites, room temperature
1 1/4 cups sugar
3/4 pound (3 sticks) unsalted butter, softened and cut in to cubes
2 pints blueberries
Directions:
Place the blueberries into a food processor and blend until they are a smooth puree.
Place the egg whites and sugar in a heatproof bowl set over a pot of simmering water. Whisk until sugar dissolves and mixture registers 160 degrees on a candy thermometer.
Remove from heat, and pour mixture in to a stand mixer.
Whisk on medium-high speed until the mixture has cooled and stiff, glossy peaks have formed. Reduce speed to medium, and add butter, 1 piece at a time, whisking well after each addition
With mixer on low, slowly add the blueberry puree, about a 1/4-1/2 cup at a time, mixing thoroughly with each addition.
Assembly
Fit a piping bag with a 10 mm star, or french, piping tip and fill the piping bag with buttercream. Pipe a rosette on to each cupcake large enough that the buttercream covers the entire cupcake. Enjoy in the summertime amongst friends and/or family while sipping iced tea… or enjoy them how and whenever you choose, these beauties are delicious really any time of year!